Sampathi asked his brother, “I can see you are fast my brother, but tell me, what can you do with your speed?”
Jatayu told his brother, “I will swoop down like a bolt of lightning and catch a fish with each of my talons.” Jatayu accomplished this task with ease to the astonishment of his older brother. Sampathi followed suit to avoid being outdone, and he too dove down effortlessly and caught a fish in each talon.
Jatayu was desperate to prove that he could best his older brother in some form or fashion. He challenged his brother to one final task, one that would prove who is superior. Jatayu told his brother the plan, “We will see which of us rules the sky. We will fly as high as the Heavens where the gods themselves reside. May the highest eagle win!”
Sampathi had always been curious to view the Heavens and he loved to compete against Jatayu. So without further ado, the two brothers soared high into the sky to begin the journey upward. They flew higher every minute, but this journey was not quick. Jatayu playfully asked, “Are we there yet?” every minute or two just to pester his older brother. Sampathi was about to kick his brother in the tail feathers, but they were quickly approaching the Heavens. Sampathi became distracted and quickly forgot about his pesky brother.
Off in the distance they caught a glimpse of the sun god. They called out and flew toward him. The sun god was not pleased to see two eagles here in his domain. He warned them to return down to earth or suffer the consequences. Sampathi realized the severity of the situation and told his brother, “It is time we leave this place and return home.” However, Jatayu was determined to prove he was superior, no matter the cost. The sun god was displeased with this defiance and began to channel his energy and send forth a solar flare of great magnitude to destroy the trespassers. Sampathi saw what was about to strike them both. He took off with tremendous speed towards his brother with the hope he might save his life. Just as the solar flare was about to strike Jatayu, Sampathi came between his brother and his imminent destruction. He spread his wings as far as they would stretch to shield his younger brother. Sampathi created a great shadow for his brother to hide in. Jatayu left unscathed but his brother Sampathi barely survived the encounter. His feathers were burnt off his body and his flesh was black as night. Without his feathers he fell from the Heavens at such a great speed that his brother could not see where his body had landed. Jatayu searched for his brother for the rest of his life, but could never repay the sacrifice Sampathi had made for him.
Bald Eagle
link
Author’s Note:
I chose to tell the story of Jatayu and Sampathi. It was meant to resemble a bedtime story you might tell to two little boys who are brothers. I do not have a brother, but I have a younger sister very close in age and I know how competitive siblings can be.
I wanted to keep the main plot points. Since the original story did not have many details, it was easy to create a more interesting tale. I like having the freedom to add more to a story without rewriting the main parts. I really liked this story because Sampathi protected his brother. I would do the same for my younger sister. Siblings can drive you crazy, but you will still do everything in your power to save them from themselves.
I added dialogue to show the camaraderie and competition between Sampathi and Jatayu. Reading the interaction between the two brothers makes the story more believable and helps the reader understand why Jatayu would not back down from reaching the Heavens. I considered having Jatayu find Sampathi, but the original ending makes it more of a cautionary tale.
I chose a picture of a bald eagle because they are regal and strong creatures.
Bibliography- "When the rains cease"Narayan, R. K. (1972) The Ramayana
OH MY GOODNESS I could not be more thrilled that you chose the story of Jatayu and Sampathi!!!! I debated on doing this story, something from Hanuman's perspective or what I ended up doing (Garuda's perspective). What's crazy is that you and Brandon, the other guy in our group this week, wrote your stories on the two that I had also thought of doing! That balanced out well :P
ReplyDeleteYou established the story very well, I could see everything in my mind's eye (as it should be). And way to really CREATE the story instead of following just what was said in Narayan's Ramayana. You really gave that anecdotal memory a life of its own. I think this would be an excellent bedtime story; I would've loved to hear this before bed when I was a child (of course I LOVED the Chronicles of Narnia, so this fits right in).
Great use of imagination in interweaving your own plot into the overall plot laid out by Narayan's Ramayana. The only suggestion I can think of is to cut the last paragraph in two, since it is so much longer than the preceding paragraphs. I would cut it between these two sentences: "The sun god was displeased with this defiance and began to channel his energy and send forth a solar flare of great magnitude to destroy the trespassers. Sampathi saw what was about to strike them both."
Great work! I enjoyed every bit of it.
These are my two favorite animal characters in The Ramayana! I liked how you created the dialogue between the brothers. I can really relate to being too competitive. Be sure to reread your story before you post it to correct small spelling errors. Take your time Scottie :) You have a great imagination. I enjoy how you develop this story between the two brothers. You showed how Sampathi took one for the team. The love between a person's sibling is weird. You can compete, argue, and then love each other more then anyone else. I know we can both definitely relate. The loyalty to Jatayu was expressed well with the actions of Sampathi. We both know how important that word is to ourselves in our every day life. Your story had some great comical moments. I can picture you saying some of these comments yourself. I like how you used more commas in this story. Good job, Scottie!
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed how creative you were with this story, however, there are a few grammatical errors. I think we all have grammatical errors though because no one is perfect at proofreading their own work. Well I at least know I am not. Back to the important thing, your story, it is very creative and relatable. The dialogue of the two brothers is very accurate to that of two real life brothers. Which for me, having an older brother, was very interesting to read and see how well you related it o a real brotherly relationship. The story overall was very captivating and I look forward to reading more of your work throughout the semester as we all continue on with building our creativity and proofreading skills.
ReplyDeleteThis was one of my favorite animal stories in all of the Ramayana. I can also understand the sibling rivalry between the two eagles. I absolutely love the theme you have implemented here, in that Sampathi's mission was to protect his younger brother at all costs. Even if someone was an only child, I believe they would be able to sense the bond between the feathery brothers in your tale. Adding the dialogue was a great touch to the story, making it more personable and relatable to your readers.
ReplyDeleteThe only odd thing I came across, while reading, was how you use "encounter" twice in the same sentence, where you're explaining the aftermath of the solar flare attack. It certainly works, but it just sounds repetitive to me. Otherwise, I must praise you on your writing skill and the way you have formulated your paragraphs. I feel as if each section of the tale was spaced and broken up evenly. Great work!
I know I have told you but I love Jatayu! Him and Hanuman are by far my favorite animal characters in this book. Surprisingly, I felt like this story needs the paragraphs to be broken up more to be easier to read on the eye. I like how you describe the competition between these two brothers. It is funny how all fun and games can end in such a tragedy. It seems like when we are younger our parents are always telling us that our sibling rivalry is going to get us in trouble one day. Too bad Jatayu and Sampathi didn't have someone warning them of these dangers.I thought your author's note was really informative, and it made the story that much more clear for the readers. My favorite part is the great image you picked of a simple eagle. I feel like all Americans can appreciate the beauty of this image. You are doing a really great job, Scotty! Keep up the good work.
ReplyDeleteYour story was intriguing. Especially because you understand the position as an older sibling so well. I am the youngest in my family and I know how much my sister protects me (sometimes it is annoying, but I know she cares). Hearing you tell the story about the brothers and how Sampathi gives his life to save his younger brother really parallels with the perspective I am sure you have with your sister. And I thought that was really neat.
ReplyDeleteHi Scott! I like your story! I really liked Jatayu’s character in the readings so I was happy to see that you decided to write a story on him! I love that your first sentence rhymed. It grabbed my attention. You did a wonderful job with the detail of your story! I enjoyed the dialogue that you included between the brothers. It helped to show their relationship as brothers who push each other’s buttons in a loving way. I like that you included a lot in your story while managing to keep your story clear and concise.
ReplyDeleteIt was such a sad ending. You did a great job of displaying the love Sampathi has for his brother by showing he was willing to surrender his life for his brother.
My only suggestion to you is to break up the paragraphs a little more and to add spacing between them so that it is easier for the reader to read!
You did an excellent job and I am looking forward to reading more of your stories as the semester continues!
Hello Scott! I enjoyed reading your story. I love how you wrote about Jatayu and his brother. I was sad reading Ramayana because there weren't much details about Jatayu and his brother. You had a great plot. It was a great idea to make them eagles because it adds imagery to your story. It was great reading the conversation between the brothers. It made the story more alive with the dialogue.
ReplyDeleteMy favorite part of the story was the last paragraph. The last paragraph had so much detail and suspense to it! You added more than enough details to the climax so that the reader could imagine the scene of the actual event that was happening.
Although the ending is a sad ending, it was a heart-warming story. It made me think about my siblings. I think it is true that Siblings can drive you crazy, but you will still do everything in your power to save them from themselves."
Your Author's note did a great job describing the changes and the plot of the story. I love how you kept the original story and just added much more detail.
I enjoyed reading your story!
Hi Scott, great job with this story! I really enjoyed reading it. Jatayu is one of my favorite characters in the Ramayana, so your story was even more enjoyable to read. Hanuman is my other favorite animal that was seen in the Ramayana. I have read about Sampathi and Jatayu’s story before but this story that you wrote had so much detail that it was easy for me to paint a picture of what all was happening. Good job creating this story and making it very unique. I could really feel the bond that Jatayu and Sampathi have as brothers. With the competing against each other, to the protection of each other, I could feel how close these two brothers were. The ending of your story made me sad when it said that Jatayu had searched for his brother for the rest of his life. The image you chose of a bald eagle is fitting to your story.
ReplyDeleteScott,
ReplyDeleteWhat a great story! I can absolutely see this serving as a bedtime story to siblings. The dialogue you added was great! It made the story more enjoyable, and added a sense of "relatable-ness". You can tell that the brothers are competitive, which is something that most brothers are! I think that your creative twists made the story easier to read. I find that sometimes these epics can become a little confusing, so I think adding certain details brings the story to life.
You have a great writing style, and the only thing I would suggest is spacing out your paragraphs. Other than that I think that your writing is very clear and concise. I also love the image you chose. It absolutely goes with your story, and I can can almost picture the brothers as actual eagles flying through the sky. Good job!